Besties On Ice

“Orange and black decorations? Is this Halloween, or...”
—  Tracy Jordan, 30 Rock

Oct 31st

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How to Find a Masculine Costume for your Effeminate Son Just when I thought today couldn’t...

Oct 31st

I need a fake tramp stamp for my 'Sexy...

So far, the contenders are “The British are Coming” and “One if by land, two if by...

Oct 31st

Screengrab of the “Dancing Grannies” clip from...

Oct 31st

Drunk (midgets in) Ewoks (costumes) on the...

Oct 31st

POP QUIZ! Am I holding a giant chocolate bar or did I...

Oct 31st

As it turns out, my 1 and a half year old niece is better at...

Oct 30th

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In honor of Halloween, I give you - Werewolf Bar Mitzvah

Oct 30th

Happy halloween!

Oct 30th

My niece, doing her Helen Keller impression.

Oct 30th

Wearing a spandex leotard on national tv...

It’s 2:30 and all I’ve eaten today is a banana. I’m going to wear a spandex...

Oct 30th

We’re taping our Halloween show today and as it turns...

Oct 30th

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Halloween at work is kind of a big deal… This is what we’re being tomorrow. (Go to the...

Oct 29th

GPOYW Being Used For My Body (for photoshops at work)...

Oct 29th

Jay/kay, going as a Slutty Revolutionary War Reenactor!  ...

Oct 28th

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mattbraunger: Big Boi from Outkast plays with penguins. Good morning, everybody! Two of my...

Oct 28th

No epiphanies here...

Tonight when I went to get a massage (since my left shoulder sporadically decides not to work/hurt...

Oct 28th

Once upon a time (2006), the brand new...

Oct 28th

Vanity Fair article: The Blatant Lack of...

Oct 27th

Lufthansa's having an airfare sale and...

Who wants to go to Lake Como for spring hiatus?? I totes have a free place to stay…

Oct 27th

Miley Cyrus’s 9 year old sister. You’re...

Oct 26th

Nathan discusses my stepmom, whom he's...

me: lisa goes to me on the phone tonight, "How about what Nathan wrote? He is FUNNY!"
Nathan: I like her more and more every day
Nathan: she and I are going to be the best of friends
me: or lovers and friends
Nathan: we're going to talk social media strategy, she's going to let me borrow her e-reader, etc.
Nathan: I could never date your step mother
Nathan: I have too much respect for your father
Nathan: Iran to London to Tampa
Nathan: that's a true Rowdie
me: i want to punch you through my computer
Nathan: I'm just a lover of the game of soccer
Nathan: sue me

Oct 26th

Nathan discusses my dad, whom he's never...

Nathan: is Farrukh still here?
me: no, his plane took off 7 minutes ago
Nathan: I knew I felt something
Nathan: his presence leaving us

Oct 26th

Just dropped this guy off at the airport after a wonderful...

Oct 26th

Headline: "Ice Skating Bear Kills Russian...

Oct 24th

Guess who's flying to LA tomorrow to...

Oct 23rd

THIS GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Except hopefully not wearing that...

Oct 23rd

delbertshoopman: ‘Children’s Hospital’ Jumping To Adult...

Oct 22nd

ryandoescomedy: True fact: I owned this doll. Yeah, it’s...

Oct 22nd

(Thanks for this, R.)

Oct 22nd

Oct 22nd

Happy birthday Paul!! To many more sketches about cat...

Oct 21st

“I think food is for fat people and poor people. Rich people...”
— - Robert Verdi So horrible...

Oct 21st

Oct 21st

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Research for work this morning let me to this… Oprah: “You Get a Car!” Remix

Oct 21st

Did we all know it's "LA Beer Week?"

Oct 20th

One of my sorority sisters had a baby...

Congrats to Eade for being slightly more productive than me today.

Oct 20th

via christinahaberkern(via patrickmelton)

Oct 19th

Guess who's in the kitchen cooking shit...

…THIS LADY! I’m even wearing an apron. Who knew cooking was so much fun?

Oct 19th

“On Thursday, a boy hid in a box. So I guess that was a...”
— Seth Meyers, Weekend Update...

Oct 18th

You know what really shuts a guy* up?

Telling him “sweet dreams to you too, Shnookums” when he texts you “sleep tight,...

Oct 18th

(On an unrelated note), a guy asked me...

(Spoiler alert: he found it.) (He texted and said, “I’m going to guess this is Joanna,...

Oct 18th

dirtypreston: urlesque: soupsoup: Favorite LOLcat...

Oct 18th

jimrock: 9gag: The Ole’ Razzle Dazzle Cats in top hat...

Oct 18th

tanya77: thedailywhat: Tara Gorman: Balloon Boy...

Oct 18th

My niece, Lily. Sometimes I still can’t fathom how...

Oct 17th

Last weekend we went to San Diego for the free Jason...

Oct 16th

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Keyboard cat likes to stay topical. (Video by the awesome Chris Cucci)

Oct 16th

I may be living in a 30 Rock episode,...

Head writer is now walking around barefoot (at the stage) because he “can’t remember...

Oct 16th

This morning our head writer and the...

Sometimes I feel like I’m living inside a 30 Rock episode.

Oct 15th

The Most Inappropriate Halloween Costumes Possible I...

Oct 15th

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Work yesterday consisted of dressing up like a plant and scaring people outside of Starbucks. (And...

Oct 15th

Yesterday I was a plant at work. (GPOYW, etc)

Oct 14th

This makes me want to never go there again as to avoid being...

Oct 14th

via petswhowanttokillthemselves: (via OMGKitty!!!) I...

Oct 13th

Apparently there’s a website of Thai trannies (and...

Oct 13th

Walk to Cure Diabetes Update

You guys! We - I say we, because I couldn’t have done it without you - reached my goal (and...

Oct 13th

rickyv: Loving it. (via) I want a baby just so I can...

Oct 13th

This is my close friend Mariam and her boyfriend, Chase....

Oct 12th

Mo’ money, mo’ problems.

Oct 12th

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GILLY’S BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!  Fewer things make me happier on a Monday morning.

Oct 12th

My cousin Hannah got married today and I wasn’t there...

Oct 11th

“Look! I’m the Coppertone Baby!!”
— Joanna I’ll just let you use...

Oct 11th

“I made my first own Jewish friend!”
— - Brittany, proud of making...

Oct 11th

“Does Adam Duritz have any black in him? If not, does he want...”
— Joanna’s question she texted...

Oct 11th

Apparently my cousin is getting married tomorrow in Florida and no one felt the need to tell me.  ...

Oct 10th

I may or may not have just gotten a flu...

Oct 9th

What rock have I been hiding under?

And why did I not realize what a total babe Pete Yorn was until today at sound check? Holy hell. 

Oct 9th

Year End Resolutions

lauraenoughalready: I figured since Im not good at new years resolutions, this year I would try...

Oct 9th

carlovely: oh fuck yes. I may be rejoining twitter just so...

Oct 9th

LA Haunted Hayride

Oct 8th

Looking back at TV's one-episode wonders

Oct 8th

“We should still go and rip it down, like that Sadaam statue...”
— Cucci, when I suggested we...

Oct 8th

OMG YOU GUYS! New Helen Keller statue at the Capitol!!!!!...

Oct 8th

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My dad sent me the link to a video of The National Capital Cat Show and wrote, “I saw this and...

Oct 8th

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I tried a bacon-flavored gumball.  Spoiler alert: It was disgusting.

Oct 8th

Things I've done at work today:

- Hand modeled a Bop-It - Ran over to a cake and took huge bites of it when ordered to  - Did the...

Oct 8th

GPOYW Orange you glad I didn’t say banana? ...

Oct 7th

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The only time I’ve ever liked Nancy Grace.

Oct 7th

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Jesus Died For Your Donuts This guy is like Yogi Oki Doki minus the yoga, plus donuts and Jesus,...

Oct 7th

Janice Dickinson’s drivers’ license, or as I...

Oct 6th

servemyworldblog: DONATE MONEY AND I’LL TATTOO WHATEVER ON...

Oct 6th

Cantaloop = Canasty’s and my motivation/reward for...

Oct 5th

Dear Nathan, The honeymoon stage is still very much alive....

Oct 4th

smileifyourewinning: ideasareawesome: A full-disclosure...

Oct 4th

Sarah did some imaginative artwork of me and the Salty Sea...

Oct 3rd

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I have no idea what’s happening here…except she seems to be performing a rousing...

Oct 3rd

Let's hope this missed connection is...

You: Jason Schwartzman Me: Loving you You: were taping an appearance on the show yesterday Me:...

Oct 3rd

Earlier I overheard someone telling someone else that you have to “fight for love” and...

Oct 2nd

10 Year Old Girl Tries to Sell Grandma on...

Oct 1st